Now Men Together
All my fathering of my son culminated in that one final hug at the airport last week.
It took two days and close to 17 hours of driving time to make the trek from our home in Colorado to his new home in Waco, Texas. With a loaded UHaul trailer behind us, I set out with my son on his final journey of departure from my home. A month ago he graduated from college, got a job in another state, found an apartment, and made preparations to start his life elsewhere. It was a good and necessary move, and I am proud of my son, the man he has become, and the man he has yet to discover within himself.
During that drive, however, I felt all the fathering years prior to this moment. Almost exactly a decade ago he and I made another significant journey, one that would shape both our lives. On a family camping trip to the Black Hills, I pulled him aside for a short hike in the woods, during which I invited him into a journey of becoming a man. As a 12 year old, his eyes lit up with both excitement and trepidation as I explained my hopes and plans for his "man year." It is astounding to me that was 10 years ago. Now as I drive my 22 year old to his new life, all my intentionality and plans, all my dreams and fears and anxieties and wrestlings, all my corrections and disciplines and hard conversations, and all my gratitude and love and relief...everything I have ever felt as a father collided inside me. There he sat in the passenger seat next to me, this grown up man whom I once held in the crook of my arm. The boy who once had a Spider-Man birthday party now told me about his new roles and job responsibilities as a rocket scientist. The passage of time as a father is both brilliant and brutal.
After helping set up the logistics of his new home, getting his keys, moving in the furniture, and unpacking the dishes into his new kitchen cabinets and his clothes into the closet, we had the opportunity to linger over a few meals in his new hometown. Much of what needed to be said had already been said on a previous father-son trip we recently took to mark his transition from college boy to full-fledged adult. But still, I wanted those meals to last as long as possible, holding on to every moment before he dropped me off at the airport for my return trip to Colorado, alone.
Despite my resistance, I could not stop time's relentless progress, and early last Sunday morning I found myself on the bustling airport curb needing to say goodbye. The confluence of all those years culminated in that one too short moment where I released my son to himself for the last time. Our embrace was kind and sweet and strong, and with a deep breath we both shifted into a new space between us. Though he will always be my son, we are now men together.
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Chris Bruno, Co-Founder and CEO
